I was listening to a radio program by Bill Tatro on Money Radio 1510 at the end of last year, and he shifted his financial analysis into a psychological commentary on the set of people who had unrealistic monetary expectations. He noted a number of his clients have a mental block about living below their means. He said that they live under the guise that the next big raise was right around the corner or that their debt would work itself out. The concept of living on $25,000/year was impossible for these clients that he described as "having a $75,000 lifestyle on a $50,000 income." He said that these people suffer from a "have-to" curse, e.g. they have to drive a new car, they have to get the latest technology gadget, and they have to eat out more often than not. It made me realize that the most troubling gap in our country is not between "the haves and have-nots," but rather those who have and those who have-to.
Speaking from personal experience, I have to live below my means. Quitting my job to start a new career was extremely stressful, even though I had enough to live on. Originally, I built up a substantial amount of savings to live on, but even then, I was not psychologically prepared to watch it deplete so quickly. I got a part-time job in retail. Once I graduated school and got a job, I started living at that income level. It wasn't comfortable, in fact, it was very stressful as those closest to me knew. It felt as though I was spending almost everything that I earned (in reality, I made money during these 2 1/2 years of a reduced income, thanks to the exceptional market conditions in 2013). But I had scaled back my spending to the point that I was no longer pulling money from savings after I got my first full-time job, although my annual income was under $25K. Living that way left me unsatisfied. It was not the lifestyle to which I was accustomed.
Later in the show, Bill Tatro wondered aloud whether people were still familiar with the financial cliche "money doesn't grow on trees." Immediately, I thought of an episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians, a show that I criticize more often than I watch, where Kendall Jenner asked her father for money, and he fed her that saying. She flippantly replied, "yes it does. Money is paper, and paper is made from trees." It was cute for 16-year-old Kendall to say, but I groaned instantly out of pity for knowing too many grown adults who feel the same way. They are the same people who have-to be "keeping up with the Kardashians," because I guess the Joneses aren't impressing anyone these days.
Financial advisers often speculate where their message is getting lost. The AICPA created a solid campaign around Benjamin Bankes, reminding people to "feed the pig," i.e. their piggy bank, and providing numerous examples of how to cut expenses. I believe the message is heard, but it is actively ignored by the have-tos in favor of the lingering effects from the message-less Occupy movement.
In short, I believe there is a certain resonating fear of income among my peer groups. When I was in high school, there were budding concerns of the youngest generation appearing to embrace (and to celebrate) failures while having an unspoken fear of success. It came to define the generation socially, especially those under the influence of the grunge music that dominated airwaves in the early 90s. Why ever try if there's nothing wrong with being a loser? The attainable goal of building productive members of society took a backseat to teaching every child to hold on to dreams.
On March 27, 2008, John Mayer posted a deeply thoughtful blog that he wrote "to shed a little light on why we're all in the same boat, no matter the shape of the life we lead: because every one of us were told since birth that we were special. We were spoken to by name through a television. We were promised we could be anything that we wanted to be, if only we believed it and then, faster than we saw coming, we were set loose into the world to shake hands with the millions of other people who were told the exact same thing."
The expectation of living a life to rival fantasy was abruptly halted by universal realities that our world failed to prepare us for because it was too busy pampering everyone equally. Last month, Oxfam released a report that 50% of the world's poorest people have the same combined wealth as the richest 85 individuals in the world. That same week, Pope Francis challenged the world's richest "to ensure humanity is served by wealth and not ruled by it."
Unfortunately, all the media coverage vilifying the rich continues to coddle an underachieving generation and seemingly to smoke screen individuals from aspiring towards a better life. Money cannot buy happiness, but life is a lot better without the endless stress cycle of not having enough money day-in and day-out. The only way to get ahead, though, is a matter of effort and determination. I hope to expand on that thought later. For now, I will just conclude that the have-tos find it easier to dream the life than live the dream.
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